Dear Blog,

Staying at home and doing a few things this few days have made me realised that i badly need a rest. I feel so lethargic at times, and something positive is missing. I don't have the urge or desire to go back into the army life. I just want to slack around the whole day.

This isn't like me.

Feels like... i lost something... lost some spark... don't know...

Haiz oh well... this period sucks... think i need to get back to irc... talk some cock there... still remember last time it provided a lot of fun and joy for me...

I think i get it already. Like what ong bu says... failure gets you right down. The disappoinment... and the fear of repeated rejections... make you lose the energy in you. The enthusiasm... will just slowly diminish...

Still remember after every Sect Comm or PC interview, i will go jumping up the stairs full of life. The encouragement and the positive remarks they gave, it totally pumped life into me. The feeling of others accepting you, seeing you as someone capable makes you feel so great that you know you can tackle anything that comes your way.


Yours,
Lah